“One kind word can warm three winter months. ” – Japanese Proverb
I think we will leave 2020 behind with a sigh of relief and a hope that 2021 will be better. The hope of life going back to normal, whatever normal will be, is what I believe is really what is keeping us all going.
This year has caused me more anxiety than I have ever experienced and coming from an anxiety sufferer, that says a lot. However, while the year has been shit overall – it hasn’t been a complete write-off either. It has made me question life choices and as a result, I am now in the process of a career change. I write more and think less about what I write because at the end of the day my blog is my space to say what I want and while life is bloody hectic at the moment, I do actually take time off for self-care.
Now you are probably wondering why I have said all this as in the grand scheme of things nothing I have written about so far is in relation to the quote and while you would be right, you are also kinda wrong. You see the thing is 2020 has taught me all of the above but it has also taught me not to be an asshole. Kind words matter. Kind words matter now more than they ever have.
Being anonymous on here gives us all an opportunity to be an asshole. Every time you hit a key on your phone or keyboard you unawarely make the choice to yuck someone’s yum, shit on someone’s good news, or just presume to worse out of the person that posted that tweet. The thing is while being on social media has its advantages, it also has its disadvantages too. It leaves you open. Vulnerable. Out there. The opportunity to do good and also a chance to be an asshole.
I know lots of things happened within the sex blogging community this year and off the mark, I was quiet about them, but for good reason. I like to fully understand what it is I am reading. There are times I have read stuff and made presumptions and I have been wrong. I have held my hands up, accounted for it, owned it, and apologized. Of course, now that I have referred to the sex blogging community – it is also fair to say no one did apologise. There are still assholes floating about and sadly, even Kinkly jumped into their boat too when they were given the chance to recalculate and do better.
Believe it or not, but 2020 has helped me not to be a presumptuous asshole.
The thing is we all have bad days.
Days that we can read stuff out of context. Post an opinion others don’t like. Sometimes that opinion can also be wrong and yanno, that is ok too. All of those things are ok because we are human. We feel things. We are individuals. The thing is we are all different and are allowed different opinions.
Sometimes I feel like others can be quick to judge. We can phrase stuff wrong and mean something completely different… I know I, myself I am terrible for this. Sometimes I write and delete far more tweets than I post because I worry it will be read wrong. I am also aware that there are folks out there who are just plain nasty too.
The moral of my essay of a post is… we all have bad days. Some of us can be really anxious, extremely vulnerable and a tweet is their way of interacting, reaching out, wanting company. Look at the profile of the person and judge that rather than 140 characters. Overall, be kind. It is so easy to give someone shit when they aren’t beside you. Be kind. As the quote says
“One kind word can warm three winter months. ”
I think now more than ever we need to remember to be kind. Kindness is the way forward and don’t be an asshole.