The world of sex toys now is so vast that it can kind of be a little intimidating as to where to start. There are so many options to chose from. In this Beginner Sex Toy Guide, I want to help you narrow it down and help you hop on the train to a new sexual pleasure.
Sex toys now come in all sorts of materials, different shapes, and more sizes than ever before. Choosing toys that are fit for purpose really is the biggest tip! There are so many toys out there that are made from materials that really are only fit for the dump and should not be put inside or even near your body!
In this guide, I am recommending materials that are safe and nonporous. (I have another post on the way about all materials and I’ll link it once it is live). Materials such as silicone, ABS plastic, metal, glass, porcelain, and wood are the way to go. They can be cleaned properly and are non-porous meaning they won’t absorb lube and body fluids and turn into toxic sponges. The material of your toy is so important. If it is too cheap then there is a good chance, it isn’t made from good material.
Beginner Sex Toy Guide – what should you have in your sex toy drawer?
A bullet vibe is the most versatile toy in any sexy toy box! It is a must-have! It can be used in so many ways from spicing up a handjob, using during partnered sex, or even just getting the job done solo. They provide powerful, direct stimulation, are teeny tiny so can easily be popped into any pocket for discreet holiday fun and they are really quiet. This Tracey Cox one is a big favourite of mine – it was my very first bullet vibe and served me well until I decided to splash out for a rechargeable one – the ultimate must-have – a We-Vibe Tango.
A Dual Stim Vibrator:
If you have never tried dual stim, then honestly, a rabbit really is a must-try. I have had a variety of them throughout the years and the only one downside I found was one size does not fit all. However, that being said, We-Vibe has now upgraded the Nova and created the Nova 2 which can literally be molded into a shape that should fit you. I am speaking directly to vulva owning folks here but all that said, rabbit vibes can be genderless too because those ears or external arm do allow the toy to be classed as anal sex safe. I am also certain because of how flexible that external arm is on the Nova 2, it could allow the user to use the internal arm for pleasurable prostate play.
A dildo teamed up with a bullet vibe is awesome if you have found that using a dual stim vibe isn’t for you. That said maybe you feel vibrations aren’t your thing at all. Dildos come in all sorts of materials, sizes, and shapes.
Silicone dildos can be as hard as plastic nearly or a squishy and realistic as the real thing as you want. I personally prefer squishy silicone and I adore the VixSkin Mustang – for me it the closest I’ve gotten to the real thing. That said, the Lovehoney Satisfy Me dildo was the first dildo to get me to g-spot orgasm without the need for vibes and it is quite firm. I am also a huge fan of the Lelo Ella for g-spotting too.
If you have already tried silicone and are looking for something new, try glass. Glass dildos can sound frightening but I can reassure they are strong and in all my years of owning toys, I have never broken one and I will admit I have most definitely dropped them by accident. They are great fun for temperature play as they absorb the temperature around them. Swapping from cold to warm water is fun and provides different sensations. The Tracey Cox glass dildo set was the very first glass dildos I bought and the clear one is still my favourite to this day. Both provide different sensations, sizes, and textures.
Get your Lovehoney Satisfy me dildo here
I bloody love butt plugs and they have so many uses in bed. Maybe you are interested in trying anal sex for the first time, a butt plug can help you train your anal sphincter muscle to the sensation of being penetrated and help it to relax more. They can also be extremely pleasurable to wear during partnered sex, allowing both you and your partner to feel new sensations. Maybe you are into pet play? Butt plugs come with tails too – time to be that fox, bunny, or even that naughty puppy! They can vibrate, jiggle and even be controllable by someone else 🙂
I most definitely recommend trying a silicone plug if it is your first time dipping into anal play as they are much softer, squishier, and have a lot more give to them than metal or glass. Oh and lash on allllllllll the lube!
or maybe that silicone rainbow scream buy me, get that here
Cock rings are known to be there to stop your penis-wielding partner from cumming but really they are more than just that! Cock rings provide pleasure to folks involved, even if you are just jacking off alone. Depending on the type you use – vibrations, electric, tighten to extremes or even be controllable by another person, cock rings can do more than just prolonging ejaculation.
The very first cock rings we got were a rubber set( yes I know – yuck, but I was uneducated then) – I figured it was the best place to start as we hadn’t a clue regards sizing etc. Thankfully, silicone sets have since appeared and I would 100% recommend anyone who is keen to try a cockring to start with a silicone set.
However, if you are keen to try a vibrating version…. Back before I started blogging we got the Tenga SVR ring for review, and recently-ish the new updated SVR plus and honestly, so far, it cannot be beaten! It is bloody incredible. Flexible, extremely powerful, and stays in place during vigours partnered sex. It also doubles up as a very rumbly clit vibe.
Bondage Rope/Bondage Tape:
Ha – did you really think I could complete a beginner guide without throwing something kink related in here.
Bondage tape is by far the most versatile item to have in any sex toy box, even if you aren’t so kink inclined. It can be used in so many ways – restraints, a gag, hold a sex toy in place and even become an outfit. Bondage tape is bloody awesome and everyone should try it, at least once. We originally got it as beginners but it makes a regular appearance in our play sessions, even seasoned players can have fun with it.
A simply snip of a scissors and you are free. It doesn’t catch on body hair. It sticks to itself and with care, is very much a reuseble product!
Many guides recommend spankers such as crops and paddles, but a set of hands is more than capable of providing pleasurable sensations. Some bondage tape holds them in place while you do it! 😉
No guide is ever complete without shouting about lube! There is still so much stigma around the use of lube but honestly folks, it makes the experience more pleasurable. Regardless of it is partnered or self-love, lube is a necessary thing and there is no shame in needing it!
I wrote an in-depth post about lube – Sex 101: The Lube Guide – and here I tell you all about the dos and donts of lube use! Long story short, not all lubes are as body-safe as they claim. Educate yourself and make a body-safe purchase!
Check out more of my Sex 101 Series here
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Images used belong to Lovehoney.