The Pipedream PDX Elite Deluxe Mega Bator – now that certainly is a mouthful to say. But what exactly is it? And more importantly, do you need one?
The Pipedream PDX Elite Deluxe Mega Bator is according to Pipedream, a chance for you to – “EXPERIENCE THE MOST ADVANCED, HANDS-FREE, USB-RECHARGEABLE STROKER EVER MADE!”. Ooh, what a seriously bold claim to make – of course all that got my OH intrigued! By god even I was intrigued and a little bit jealous, I was missing the required part needed to get the full benefits of using this toy.
So what comes in the box?
Inside you’ll find the system itself, a USB charger, 2 extra toppers (one is pre-assembled on the device), the attachments that make up the media device holder, the suction cup, three different sized silicone cock rings, a mini bottle of lube and toy cleaner. The toppers included are lips, a vulva and an ass, well the hole bit to be precise! The toy is rechargeable and a 2-hour charge gives 1.5 hours worth of play and given how much messing I did with as well as my OH using it – I find those measurements accurate.
The system is made up of several parts – the black bit is the actual mechanical side of it. It’s the bit you charge and also the bit that allows you to control the Pipedream PDX Elite Deluxe Mega Bator. It is made up of a power button (o), </> buttons which control the modes and +/- buttons which control the intensities! There are 10 different settings and each setting has 5 different speed levels.
The clear tubing is the next bit and in here you can completely dismantle it all for clean up. The actual moving/spinning bit is attached via magnet or the “exclusive sleeve suspension” as Pipedream like to call it and it comes away quite easily. And on top of all that goes the ‘topper’ and you can choose whichever orifice you prefer.
The Pipedream PDX Elite Deluxe Mega Bator has become known as the ‘DiscoStick’ in our house and I’m sure the images display why. It is literally like having your own personal disco ball in bed. It looks awesome for like the first five minutes I guess and then it’s a pain in the ass. It’s distracting to be honest – even from a spectator’s point of view. In my opinion, it’s almost a piss take. Like how could you possibly take jacking off into a disco ball seriously? And I think my thoughts fall quite evenly matched with my OH because when I asked for his thoughts on the Mega Bator – “it’s fun” was repeated several times throughout my notes… And if truth be told we certainly did have fun putting this toy through its paces.
His face, in particular, while trying to control how the Pipedream PDX Elite Deluxe Mega Bator works is possibly one of the funniest moments I have ever experienced during our reviewing. The controls and settings on this thing are sporadic, to say the least. There is no here nor there to how they move. The patterns go from fast to slow to jerky to just plain weird quite quickly. Most toys have some levels of progression so you can kinda have an idea on what to expect when you press the button – the Pipedream PDX Elite Deluxe Mega Bator, however, eliminates every idea of normality and each time you are in for a ride of surprise.
From my point of view – it is seriously hot watching him put himself in the transparent tubing. My mind goes nuts thinking all sorts and then to add to it, all the glass steams up.
Sadly though there are certainly more negatives than positives when it comes to this toy. The noise is a huge factor – the centre spinning bit tends to rattle against the sides of the outer casing quite a bit and if it isn’t doing that then it’s because it has come to a complete halt altogether. You really need to judge how much of yourself you can actually thrust into it. However, this doesn’t happen as much when it is mounted in comparison to using the toy lying down. It won’t take all my OH either so realistically, it probably will only supply sensations to the top of half of you.
The toy needs refining – those patterns need adjusting. They are far too jerky and inconsistent. The motor needs to be slowed down completely and be more controlled with options to personalise it more. There needs to be an option to power off those lights too.
The suction cup works well and stays in place once mounted correctly. The media device holder holds extremely well – it will accommodate up to a small tablet. It is a little fiddly the first few goes but once positioned correctly it, it will hold onto whatever device you slot in well.
My OH isn’t particularly keen on the toppers – they all feel similar and extremely tight. It bugs the living beejesus outta him they don’t line up correctly with the controls. Like he spent I dunno how long trying different ways to get them to line up and nope, it just wasn’t happening. There is also an included lid so which is handy for storage and travel.
For him personally, the Mega Bator is a ‘Him’ toy only. It’s not a foreplay toy as it desensitizes him too much to feel anything after he has tried it. Regardless of if he was just using as a warm-up toy – the movements are far too abrupt. I can understand this feeling as similar happens my clit with a buzzy toy and as a result, this toy just isn’t one for him.
From a cleanup point of view – it’s super easy to clean. All the top half of it can be completely dismantled and the piece is also 100% waterproof. We didn’t opt to use either the ‘lube’ or the toy cleaner as they are both full of ingredients we wouldn’t be a fan of. He used lots of Sliquid with it in use because otherwise, you would end up with cock chaff apparently and judging on how this thing moves I wasn’t in a position to disagree with him lol.
In his words ” it has massive potential – but sadly, it just isn’t quite there.”
Overall, we had lots of fun testing out this toy – many giggles occurred. I do wonder if they will create an updated version. And one that has silicone attachments instead. This really annoyed me because the toy is quite expensive – you’d think all parts would be 100% body safe. Like what do you do when the tops eventually die?
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